May 2012
3 posts
Finals..
Oh how I dread finals.. Like seriously.. I am running on like a combined total so far of 6 hours of sleep. From Monday till now.. And once I get home from my last final.. I am going to knock out.. Wake up.. And crunch time on some last minute online homework
I don’t know who will read this but you’re probably thinking “OMG ONLINE HOMEWORK?! THAT SOOO MUCH BETTER THAN TEXTBOOK...
Heh
So it seems that I was just used as a crutch to get you up. After you’re able to walk, you no longer seem to want to talk to me or even try to keep a conversation. I won’t let myself be so naive next time. All those nice things you said were just bull shit on the inside. I am the biggest idiot in this world to let myself believe in your sugar coated words.
I guess this is good bye...
Heh.. Based on yesterday, I can tell just by looking at you in the eyes, you don’t appreciate the time we spend together on Tuesdays and Thursdays.. Which spanned over the course 3-4 months now…
Whatever.. I greatly appreciate and treasure them. By far those were the only happiest times I have so far in this college campus. So thank you.. I will always remember them.
At the same...
April 2012
12 posts
Heh, knew it.. I’m too much of a boring guy. I knew I wouldn’t have had a chance anyways.. I hope that guy makes you the happiest!! That is all I wish for you!
Hmm.. Just when I thought my apathy was slowly going away… Nope! It came back because I guess I couldn’t deal with my own feelings… So rather than me taking it on.. I shunned it away.. Not sure how long it will take for my apathy to regress.. This sucks.. Not being to feel any other emotions… Hahaha I do sound like some kind of robot or a mega super dork…
I really...
Heh… I’m starting this kind of stuff doesn’t suit me at all. It never worked to begin with… Hmm, perhaps the worst case scenario may actually come true.. Who knows… There is still time, I guess… We’ll see..
Its funny how feelings works.. Or atleast mines… I don’t know why I always assume these things when in reality it was never like what I hoped to be.. I guess I got too absorbed into my own feelings and kept going back to it.. As a result it naturally grew and of course, its one sided yet again. This sucks lemons.
I.. Give up..
I HONESTLY HAVE NEVER FELT SO OLD LOL.. My back really hurts QQ.. /endcomplaint.
*Siigh*.. Not really doing anything important in my life… I don’t know, I feel like I’m always wasting my time some how.. I feel… Really disconnected with things as of lately.. Not sure why.
So thats how it is huh.. I knew I shouldn’t be too absorbed in my feelings.. I mean this isn’t as bad as it was like during my high school days.. But still.. It sucks nevertheless.. Gotta remind myself that there is no hope (I don’t even know why I still hang on). Well there was any to begin with anyways. You probably have your eyes set on another person. Ah, another moment to...
I hate the feeling when you know its all one sided again.. This always ends up happening to me.. Never been a time where the feelings are mutual.. Hahaha, perhaps… Maybe there is no hope for me? Everyone always says the same thing.. I already know it all.. But I’m just wondering how long I’ll have to keep searching.. I first started to like you during Sophomore year.. But found...
Lolwut
LOL!! Sorry about what? There no need for you to be sorry! O__O.. If you’re talking about… Well THAT.. No worries! You know how I don’t really mind if someone doesn’t remember! LOLOLOL! That… Actually makes me sound like a sad loser.. Now that I think about it.. BUT OH WELLS! LOLOL..
I wonder how long it will be until you notice.. I mean a part of me doesn’t really care that you didn’t realize it but.. Its okay. I’m just really curious to see what your reaction would be. At the same time, I’m not expecting much of a big reaction at all.
March 2012
10 posts
5 More minute oh god..
3 tags
Yeah soo..
I really don’t know whats with the mass hype about the Hunger Games.. But for my freshman college English class, the teacher made us read the book.. And so far.. I must say… ITS SO BORING.. awjfywaghtaw3hikwehjwuhqar.. I DO NOT LIKE THIS BOOK LOL.. So many people praising the book to be super awesome.. But its.. Okay.. Not that great.. K GOING BACK TO FINISHING MY ENGLISH ASSIGNMENT!...
Late post is late
Oh boy! Even though I know it is Wednesday (at the time I’m typing this up) and its late to make a post about this but oh well.. LOL.. Anyways! Sunday was a pretty freaking awesome day for me! Hahaha, I got to see three people whom I haven’t seen for soooooo sooo long! It was nice seeing them (You guys know who you are). Loolz, I feel like I was being too much of an awkward turtle...
10 more days…
Oh me and my one sided feelings. I wish it would just stop.. I am tired of this…
19 more days.
21 more days…
2 tags
If only we wouldn’t be afraid to communicated our feelings directly.. I wish that we weren’t afraid of doing so…
I tell myself every time to stop liking you (Not to mention among other girls in the past). Cause I knew in my mind, it wasn’t going anywhere and it would be another one sided thing.. However, my heart decides to be a rebel and refuse to listen to my mind....
Twenty nine days.. I really hope nothing happens at that day. Wouldn’t want a repeat of last year.
2 tags
Okay.. Lets be real, who the fuck would steal someones math homework.. IN COLLEGE?! WTF.. God damn it.. Now I have to re-do this homework.. Which is easy cause I know what to do but wasting time doing this assignment again.. Utter bull shit. I hope the person who stole it receive a tar and feather punishment. Oh right, I forgot the background story.. So the class had to pull out our homework to...
February 2012
9 posts
Wow.. I haven’t woke up and felt very horrible in a long long time..
Codependency… I see.. Now I understand a bit more..
3 tags
Hahaha yeah.. Just right when I developed feelings for you again.. I knew it never goes right.. Any one I ever liked.. It just goes all down hill… Hah, alteast I know early on unlike the rest.. Still, it hurts.. :.. I told myself I wouldn’t experience this again.. I am really hopeless after all.. I guess.. From this point on, I should pretty much say or consider my personal love...
Ugh.. This migraine is killing meee ;___;..
“Don’t over think things. In my experience, people who are absorbed in...”
– Shinobu
Yeah, I’m gonna be a kid in this post BTW. It annoys the fuck out of me (and I don’t get easily annoyed) when you can’t do something simple as letting me use your god damn web cam for like an hour or two.. I’ll return it and plug it back in. No problem right? No but you wouldn’t let me borrow that cause I wouldn’t bring you your ice cream cup that I TOOK OUT OF...
1 tag
Sadlife...
So I got enough sleep somehow and woke up at 4 AM.. Yes 4 Am.. Where no one is on to talk to.. And.. I don’t know how I passed the time but I did.. You know how sad is it to see the sun rise ? LOL ALONE TOO?! AND LETS NOT FORGET TO MENTION I HAD NOTHING BETTER TO DO.
Siigh… My life..
Fuck you
I don’t fucking understand why you want an Iphone 4S when you know we can’t afford to have a fucking data plan added to our phone bill. What the fuck… There is nothing wrong with the phone you have right now. The only problem is mom’s phone. Her is broken and has a legitimate reason to have it replace/get a new phone. You don’t. I don’t want to fucking pay 600...
January 2012
8 posts
Ah.. I think I’m probably hearing things.. I swear I thought someone’s voice talking to me.. But I couldn’t hear clearly.. It was just something.. @__@;;..
Ahhh… My back hurts and my shoulder hurts lately.. I’m getting old.. Oorrrrr I need to fix my sleeping position LOL..
@__@.. Man.. I haven’t been on here for a few days.. Bleh.. I have nothing productive to do with my last few days of break… Its depressing a bit cause I’m 90% of the time stuck at home.. Doing nothing productive..
Sometimes dreams are nice or scary. There was a scary dream I had two days ago.. For some reason it was me chasing a friend.. Then that friend turned to an alleyway for a short cut.. Suddenly that friend stopped and yelled “whoa!” and got shot in the head by a mysterious hooded person.. That friend’s body fell to the ground. I don’t know why I ran towards that mysterious...
Hmm.. You do have a good point.. I do spend a lot of my time worrying about others but I don’t really impose my own problems on anyone..
3 tags
Heh.. Its funny, listening to this song.. It brings me back to those days… Those days where I was really caught up in trying to get over you and not focus on other important things. I’m not so sure why I like you that much.. Even to this day! But its in the past. I mean its not like these memories hurts me anymore. Its just nostalgic thinking about those times. Ah high school.. What a...
I don't understand..
It seems to be that you don’t mind the attention of strangers or people you’re not well acquainted with.. However, to friends or people you know, you don’t really care that they pay attention to you. I don’t understand why you enjoy the attention or care of those kinds of people when there are other people that actually cares (or in your case no one. Since you don’t...
December 2011
7 posts
3 tags
I should stop.. Its not going to get me anywhere… And this never worked out for me in the beginning. Despite what my friend said today.. “Its because you give up”.. I wish I had a strong determination like you are.. Even though you know you’re chasing something impossible.. You knew he is unable be able to look at you.. And yet you still try..
Though its the same for me.....
“when what you want to do is what you have to do, you’ll hear the voice of...”
You always seem to stay in your own world, with many walls around you…
Why did I expect you to say a hello or hi to me.. I don’t know why it hurts that you didn’t say that to me or anything.. I was fine if we didn’t talk at all during the group hangout.. But still.. With something like that I would of been okay with it..
Sigh.. I’m such a pathetic guy.. Even after a couple years.. I’m bothered by something small like that..
Well I’m going to go on a tangent on a lot of things here but.. I guess I have to start somewhere with this post right? LOL…
Anyways, so.. I apologize for my stupid behavior and bothered you so much at that time.. I’m sorry that I said so many awkward things and basically made our well.. “Friendship” the way as it is right now.. Really distant.. And I don’t...
Alriiight.. Some people on facebook is ridiculous… I was randomly looking for a childhood friend of mine and suddenly stumble upon a person’s FB.. I look at their “Job” that they listed.. It said: “I don’t work. People work for me.”
I just don’t understand… I know people got some dreams (or some kind of boss/god complex.. Whatever it is) but...
Heh.. What a load of bullshit… Why would I even care or put effort into this ?
I really don’t know what you’re thinking… What you say contradict your own actions. What do you really want? Cause it seems to be you have too much high expectations for anyone.. You have to realize you’re going to have to work with whats here and now.. Even if you don’t want to...
November 2011
6 posts
